Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Relationship Reboot

A few months back I had a fantastic first date with someone, but the relationship died during the second date due to something unfortunate.  Looking back on the incident, we both know exactly where we went wrong, but we have remained friendly, chatting here and there, ever since.

This is someone I genuinely like, someone I find funny and charming and worth spending time with.  We have a lot of natural chemistry.  Normally I don't continue to pursue friendships with people if dating them didn't work out, because I find it awkward.  With this boy, it feels natural to allow a friendship to grow.

Last night we met up for drinks and a light dinner.  We talked about his recent experience at the OpenSF conference and all the amazing people he met while there.  We talked about the need for a more diverse and activist poly community here in Chicagoland.  We walked around the shopping center aimlessly, chatting and doing that thing where you keep bumping into each other as you walk.  It felt great.  There was plenty of positive energy, but absolutely no pressure for anything more than chatting, flirting, and enjoying each other's company.

Perhaps the funniest thing about the evening was the expectations of our friends and lovers - they knew we were going out, and most of them assumed that things would get sexy.  Live tweeting during the evening made things even more hilarious - when we decided to go hot tubbing, I got a lot of "nudge nudge, wink wink" type responses.  But even in the water, we just chatted.  There was some incidental touching, and playful banter, but nothing ever felt like it was going to lead to a place we didn't want it to go.

At least not yet.  Who can say what will happen?

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